“Is this your cat?”

When a cat chooses to adopt a human, the chosen human is doomed from the start. Even if you don’t consider yourself a cat lover, you will be converted if the cat’s determined enough. Most are, once they’ve made up their minds that you’re The One. Instead of passively accepting our fate from the first meow, many of us pass through several stages of denial before final acceptance. It’s a human thing.

With Antonio and me, it began in the Fall of 2008 when the handsome lad began stalking me. A TNR-ed (trapped/neutered/returned) member of my apartment complex’s feral cat colony that I administer, I accepted Antonio as a “friendly feral” – he solicited and allowed petting – one of only two of my 15 (give or take) colony cats to do so.

Despite the obscenely early hour (pre-predawn) that I trek out to feed the colony, Antonio would almost always be waiting beside the feeding station with a welcoming meow and a brief nip to my hand if I didn’t get the food dished out fast enough to suit His Highness. Gradually, he started meeting me halfway across the yard, then near the parking lot, and eventually at the outer door of my building! By December 2008, he was not only meeting and “herding” me to the feeding site with the enthusiasm and expertise of a sheep dog, but was escorting me back to the building afterwards.

When the pitiful “let me in” meows started, I reminded him that he’s a FERAL cat and would NOT enjoy indoor life. Antonio begged to differ. Okay, so maybe he was just curious to see what’s on the other side of a closed door. That’s a cat thing.

So, I let him come in, expecting he’d hate it, especially since I closed him in my bathroom to keep him separated from The Fab Five. This is a normal APARTMENT-sized bathroom folks – not your big, roomy, sunken jacuzzi tub sized bathroom. Since I don’t normally test my ferals for FeLV or FIV, I didn’t want to take the chance of him mingling with my guys, in case he was a carrier of these diseases. I provided Antonio with a warm, fuzzy blanket, a litter box – in uncertain hope he’d know what to do with this - food and water and expected to hear him shrieking for release within 15 minutes or less. I settled down on my sofa with a book and read for two hours before retiring – not a peep from the bathroom. He spent the night – calmly and yep, neatly.

The next morning he WAS ready to go out, but again followed me home and requested entry. And so it went for several days until I made an appointment with my vet to have him tested. I still had absolutely NO intention of “adopting” him, but figured if he wanted to spend the cold winter nights indoors, he’d be more comfortable having free roam of the apartment. Thankfully, he tested negative and didn’t even have a single flea, tick, or ear mite, despite at least a year’s life outdoors.

I’d already had my suspicions, but it was the vet visit that proved beyond a doubt that Antonio had outright, bold-faced, deliberately lied on his resume – checking off the “feral” box instead of the “tame”. By then, I knew I could pet him, pick him up and carry him against my shoulder like a human baby… but was it just me? Some ferals DO bond and develop hands-on friendships with their caregivers – but ONLY their caregivers. Antonio went into a cat carrier – not a feral trap mind you, but a normal pet carrier - without protest and purred through his vet exam to the point where the doctor asked if I knew how to turn him OFF so she could listen to his heartbeat!

To combine two quotes from two different friends – I’d been “schmoozed” by a “Feral My Ass!” (FMA) cat!!

January and February in Maryland were cursed with many bitterly cold days, and living on a hill as I do, often equally brutal winds. Antonio spent more time enjoying his new-found luxury indoors than out. He quickly established his routine (and changed mine!). After some indoor breakfast, he’d accompany me out to the feeding station, grab a bite or two there, chase away the other cats as was his habit, possibly to prove he’s still King of the Hill in the feral world - then follow me back home and indoors. Sometimes he’d want back out when I’d leave for my first job of the day, sometimes not.

One morning he DID try to warn me NOT to venture out to work yet. Silly me, I didn’t listen. Antonio came as far as the snow cleared portion of the sidewalk and meowed rather insistently, refusing to continue any further. I made the mistake of proceeding, and landed flat on my derriere when my boots encountered a patch of “black” ice. I fell two more times before limping back to the apartment, Antonio leading the way with an “I told you so” prancing step and sassily cocked tail tip – and delayed my departure. I swear that cat was laughing at me.

During the next several days when the hillside leading to the feeding station turned into an Olympic-sized ice rink - times ten - and I slip-slided up and and down with the tremulous, cautious pace of a 95-year-old, Antonio glided across the treacherous surface with the confidence and grace of a gold medal figure skater. There was no doubt left in my mind – he was indeed making fun of my poor human endeavors on ice – and didn’t even bother to hide his amusement! Lucky for him he’s so darn cute!

It wasn’t long after the FMA cat started making regular appearances at the outer door to my apartment building, demanding entry and spending nights here, that neighbors took notice.

And so it began. “Is this your cat?” “Uh, no, not really. He lives outdoors and sometimes spends the nights here when it’s really cold”. From a basement apartment neighbor “Is this your cat?” “Not exactly”. “Cool cat, he’s wandered into my apartment a couple times and made himself right at home.” From a second floor neighbor “Is this your cat?” “Kinda – he spends some time inside with me”. “Wow, we’ve been letting him come in here too, but separate from our two cats, giving him something to eat”.

I assured these folks he was neutered, tested, vaccinated and safe to be around their cats. From the maintenance guy fixing up the vacant apartment next door to me “Is this your cat? I let him into the building since he seemed to belong and he’s been in here watching me work. Really friendly guy”. Antonio was sitting in the open doorway of the empty apartment and upon spotting me immediately meowed to come in. “Yeah, well, he sorta lives here”. From a new neighbor who just moved in “Is this your cat?” “Well, he thinks he is” – as I scooped him up in my arms and carried him inside before he could invade their apartment as well.

Aside from the obvious fact he’s been mooching off more than one of my neighbors, he’s apparently chosen MY home as his primary place of residence when he prefers indoor life. Okay, I GIVE! He’s MY cat. Or more accurately, I’m HIS human. I’ve even ordered a bright red break-away collar with his name and my phone number embroidered on it for him to wear – in case someone decides the “poor” outdoor stray kitty needs rescuing and tries to confine him strictly indoors. Not that I think he’d allow that – he makes it VERY clear when he wants out – and very clear when he wants in!

So, what do y’all think of “The Sensational Six”? Yikes! I had no intention or desire of adding another cat to my household, but the decision apparently was never mine to make.

As for The Fab Five, cool cats that they are – they’ve adjusted to his part-time presence pretty well. Antonio doesn’t bother them; they don’t bother him – at least for the most part. He and The Raz are even starting to develop a tentative friendship. There’s the occasional hissing and posturing to be expected with newcomers, but nothing of a serious nature. If Antonio chooses to stay in when I leave for work, I come home to find everyone peacefully napping in their preferred spots – and my breakables unbroken. If he wants out when I leave, he’s usually hovering somewhere nearby when I return, ready to follow me back up the stairs to “our” home.

Given the season, there aren't too many afternoons or evenings here in Maryland that it’s actually comfortable to be outside for any length of time, unless you just enjoy freezing temps and numb fingers. On those rare occasions though, Antonio and I enjoy a stroll about the grounds together. He’s a wonderful walking companion and better behaved than many dogs on leashes I see pulling their owners around. I must admit it’s kinda cool to go for a leisurely walk with a cat who trots along right beside me – and enjoy the incredulous looks we get! “Is that a cat?” While the temptation to say “No, it’s my elephant” is often strong, I usually manage to restrain myself…

My little con artist enjoys napping on the heavily padded lid of my printer when I’m working on the computer and in the middle of the sofa when I’m sitting there reading or watching tv. He likes being nearby, but not (as yet) a lap cat. Probably just as well or Minnie Pearl would have serious jealousy issues – he and The Raz are the Primo Lap Cats (and bed cats) of the household.

When Spring arrives and the days AND nights warm up, will Antonio still want to spend some time indoors with us? I hope so. He is, after all, MY cat…

Visit The Fab Five and diana at http://www.geocities.com/newagecatcare. diana is a pet sitter in Carroll County, MD; Vice President of the Howard County Cat Club, a 501(c)(3) non-profit, no-kill cat rescue/adoption agency http://www.howardcountycatclub.org; freelance pet photographer, and Catnip Chronicles columnist and consultant.

Y’all don’t need me or even the magnificent Fab Five (plus Antonio) to remind you these are tough times for animals – everyone knows it and most who care for animals are living with the consequences of their own suddenly restricted or depleted funds.

Now is the time to reach out to your local shelters and feral colony caregivers. If you’re not sure someone you know would accept financial assistance, or unsure the funds would REALLY be used for the animals – be an anonymous donor! Leave some cat food on a door step or at a known feeding site. Or offer to do a service for someone in exchange for some cat food for your local shelter or feral caregiver – rake their leaves, mow their yard, run some errands – be creative!

Give the “I’ll work for food” concept a whole new meaning – to help friends of the animals continue to help their animal friends!