My name is Booper and I have cerebral palsy. Don't feel sorry for me, though. I'm not disabled. I'm differently-abled. Lately, I've been a little more wobbly that usual, but Momma says that I'm just getting older. She makes sure that my ears are cleaned out and that I'm still "marching down the hall". Momma says that I don't walk as much as I march. My front end behaves normally, but I walk like I have neuropathy in my back feet.

In January we had some excitement at our house. The phone and microwave died at the same time. Momma and Aunty Susan still had their cell phones, but the microwave was a biggy. Momma would starve to death without a microwave. She doesn't really cook, but she's good at zapping things. For a few days, Aunty Susan did the cooking, because Momma doesn't use the oven. When Momma was little, her granny (my great-granny) blew up the oven and the oven door went sailing past Momma, right through the window. That was enough to make Momma believe that ovens were nasty things. Finally, we got a microwave and we all got treats. The phone came a few days later. For some reason, Shopper loves the new phone and sits there waiting for it to ring. Maybe she's expecting a call.

Did you know that cats can have personal trainers? Well, Webster does. I've never mentioned Webster before, because he never paid any attention to me. Now, we're best buddies. Webster is three years old and a real fatty. Don't worry, he doesn't mind being called that. Momma calls him "Wilber, the pig", "Fatty Arbuckle", and "Mama's Little Porker". Webster came to us as a little guy who was skinny and full of fleas and ear mites. It didn't take long for Momma and Aunty Susan to make him healthy. He was getting along very well until the Little Old Guys came to live with us. The Little Old Guys are dogs: a 12-year-old MinPin and a 15-year-old Schipperke.

Momma and Aunty Susan used to leave dry dog food and canned dog food out for the Little Old Guys. It always disappeared quickly and was promptly replaced, but the Little Old Guys weren't gaining any weight. One day, Momma looked down and Webster was obese. She did some detective work and figured out that Webster was eating the dog's food and his own food, too.

That's when the problem arose: What do you do about a fat cat? In our house, the problem has always been how to keep weight on. Now Momma had a fat cat to deal with. They started feeding the Little Old Guys by hand and at specific times and no canned food was left out. They changed the bowl of dry food, so that is was less than a 1/4 cup for the dogs. It worked for the dogs, but Webster still overate.

That's when the Feline Personal Trainer came to be. Aunty Susan started Webster on an exercise program. She made some yarn balls for him to use as soccer balls and some dangling things for him to bat. That wasn't enough. Aunty Susan and Momma were afraid that if he climbed or jumped that he might hurt himself, so Aunty Susan started the "Webster". She takes Webster on her lap and lets him lean back against her. She then takes his front paws and does slow boxing moves: Right cross, left cross, upper cut with left paw, upper cut with right paw, and then really fast jabbing for the count of ten. After that, Aunty Susan does some kick-boxing moves with his hind legs. It looks funny, but Webster loves it and asks for more. It all seems to be working, because he is losing weight. I can't make fun of Webster. Momma did something like that for me and helped me learn to walk.

I'll let you know how things progress in our household. Stay tuned.

My name is Booper and I'm ten years old.

THE WEATHER IN OUR NECK OF THE WOODS

Hi, I'm so glad that you stopped by to visit. Around here in January, everyone was talking about the weather. First it snowed and then it rained and then it snowed again. After that, it became Spring for a whole week and then it started raining again. More snow came and then more rain. Now it's snowing again. The Farmer's Almanac says that February's going to have lots more snow. Personally, I like snow. When you look out the window, everything is white and you can see the birds and bunnies hopping around. That's fun, but it's not fun for Mama. Mama goes hunting at "the store" for our food. If she gets lost in the snow, we could starve. I vote that we find this Farmer and burn his Almanac.

I'M STILL LIVING IN THE BATHROOM.

If you are behind the times, I was being harrassed by Sherman and Holly. Those two terrorists were causing me to lose sleep and overgroom myself. I no longer felt beautiful. I was a mess. Mama kept taking me into the bathroom and closing the door. It was so peaceful in there all by myself and people came to visit me all of the time, during the day and evening. One day, Mama took me out of the bathroom and I just turned around and went right back. I had made up my mind and Mama wasn't going to change it. She tried, but I won. Mama got me a beautiful bed, my own water and food dishes. I also get to decorate the bathroom however I want. I've gotten into the cabinet and pulled out the toilet paper. Toilet paper is great to shred. It's so much fun and personalizes my space, but the most fun was when Aunty Susan brought in my new shower curtain. As soon as she put up the liner, I went to work. It wasn't long until the liner was perfect. It shredded very well. After that, Aunty Susan didn't put up the new curtain, but just got another liner. I'll start working on that later today.

A MONSTER RETURNS TO TAUNT US.

A new "Sucking Monster" came to our house. Mama and Aunty Susan brought it home from one of their hunting trips. They think that their new "vacuum" is great. "Sucking Monsters" are never great. They are loud and suck up our hair and toys. We felines are plotting to kill it. I'll keep you posted.

FELOGA.

Feloga is Feline Yoga. Every month, I give hints on health and exercise. This month is just for fun. It's called the FELOKEY DOKEY. You find a nice spot where you are relaxed and comfortable. Then... You put your right paw in and your right paw out, and your right paw in and you shake it all about. You do the Felokey Dokey and you turn yourself around. Then... you put your left paw in and your left paw out and your left paw in and you shake it all about. You do the Felokey Dokey and you turn yourself around. Repeat with your right hind leg and your left hind leg. For those very experienced, you may continue with your tail. You do the Felokey Dokey and turn yourself around. When you are finished, you take a nap. That's what it's all about.

ONYX AND MUGGSY.

Booper told you about our Little Old Guys, Onyx, a Schipperke, and Muggsy, a MinPin. After Booper sent in her column, Onyx, almost 16 years old, died. Onyx was the kind of dog to have in a feline household. He never barked at us. He never chased us. If he tried to eat our food, all we had to do was bop him on the nose and he went crying to Mama. He couldn't see too well and his hearing was going, but he had a great nose for hot dogs and peanut butter. Muggsy, 12 years, is yappy and sometimes a real poop, but we all feel sorry for him now. He slept through Onyx's seizure and death, so he is really confused about where Onyx is. We tried to explain about the Rainbow Bridge and I think that he partially understands. When Mama and Aunty Susan take him out, he looks up at the sky. I think that he's looking for Onyx's Rainbow. He'll be OK, but it'll take some time. Mama cries, too, but we're giving her extra snuggles, so she'll be just fine.

My name is Belle and I’m three years old.